This Maternal Mental Health Awareness Week, the theme is Your Voice, Your Strength. Meet Davina — a mum who courageously shares her journey through motherhood and how becoming hypervigilant changed the way she saw the world.

Opening up and asking for help was one of the hardest things Davina faced — not because she didn't need support, but because she feared it meant she was failing.

Davina kindly shares her experience in the blog below OR you can watch an animated video talking through her story on our YouTube channel by clicking here.

For more information on postnatal depression and perinatal mental health please check out our factsheet and website.

It's hard to describe what it feels like to become a mother. It is a time of profound transformation, of becoming someone entirely new. Nothing can prepare you for the overwhelming, life-changing love you'll feel, nor the fear of failing. Hypervigilance takes over, and you live solely for the survival of another.

The sacrifice is real and raw, but you cannot imagine your life without the tiny human you've grown, nurtured, and loved from the moment you knew they were growing inside you.

Everything is magnified. You live for every breath, every snuffle or cough. You exist in fight or flight mode. Anxiety becomes an unwelcome but constant companion. Shallow breathing and a racing heartbeat become your norm. You live and breathe for your child. What you once worried about pales into obscurity. But you know this is a basic instinct, an evolutionary response. You will do anything and everything to protect your baby.

Sonny was born at 10am on June 18, 2018. The sun beamed through our home-from-home unit at Ulster Hospital. It was a 16-hour labour. As excruciating as the pain of childbirth was, it was "uncomplicated and straightforward," according to my school teacher-style midwife.

I remember feeling somewhat appalled and minimised by this trite statement, but I knew I was incredibly fortunate to have the birth plan I wanted - a water birth - and to bring a beautiful, healthy boy into the world.

As I gazed at my perfect newborn son snuggling into my husband's bare chest, I knew everything in my life had changed. My world had shifted on its axis. I became a mother, gifted with the most privileged job in the world. You would go through whatever it takes to bring your child into the world, and I know I was lucky. But I was so new to this. I had never changed a nappy. Everything was a new experience.

The hardest thing was sleep deprivation. Those early days of becoming a mother were a blur of night feeds, nappy changes, and watching his tiny chest rise and fall while he slept.

I remember taking Sonny out in his buggy for the first time, my white knuckles gripped tightly on the bar. I was hyper-aware of all the surrounding sounds and anything that could harm my precious baby.

This state of being continued for eight months before I lost myself. I experienced feelings that were new and terrifying to me. I needed to be there, but I wasn't. Despite my strong support system, I needed help.

Thankfully I got it but not without asking more than once.

Believe me when I say the hardest thing is asking for help. As women, we don't want to feel like we are failing in the most enormous role there is. The turning point for me was talking to my partner. His compassion, empathy and understanding of how I felt helped me to seek out the help I needed. It also helped me to accept my thoughts and feelings and not fight them. Talking to friends who were also going through the trials of motherhood helped as did being honest with family members.

The biggest thing you can do for your mental health is to talk. Bottling up emotions is so bad for the body and puts you in a perpetual state of fight or flight. My advice is to permit yourself to feel your emotions and let go.

As women, we are expected to live up to impossible standards. It is hard. We carry a lot of pressure as women. We spin many plates. Becoming a mother means shedding the skin of your former life, one that prioritised your own needs.

But your needs are as important as your baby. I know that now, having felt lost myself.

What I have learned the hard way is that self-care is not just a buzzword. There is no magic switch. It's more than a meditation session, more than a bath, it's about daily habits to improve your wellbeing.

It does take discipline, which I am not very good at but anything practised with consistency will provide huge dividends.

Communication is key and it is not easy, even though communication is my profession. Do not keep your feelings to yourself. The people that matter, the people that love you want to help and want you to be happy.

Your life will change when you become a mother. You may lose friends, but you will make new ones. Becoming a mother has made me the woman I want to be. I don't even know the woman I was before becoming one.

It's such a joy to see your baby become a little person. It's the most important job I will ever do.

Every woman is different. This is my experience. I cannot speak for every woman but you will get through whatever comes your way. I hand on heart promise you that.

The hardest thing is to ask for help. But I hope you do.

When I look at my son, his huge blue eyes, his perfect skin, his beautiful personality, I'm humbled and grateful for this incredible experience.

Becoming a mother is hard, but you are so much stronger than you realise. If for any reason you feel like you are not coping, ask for help. It's the best thing you will ever do. I asked for help. So can you.

Tags: maternal mental health week | Mental Health | Northern Ireland | perinatal mental health | postnatal depression